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a blog by a mess of a woman.

Posts tagged daily

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good morning world!

it’s a dreary Monday here in Toronto, and I slept through my 9am lecture.  Truthfully I’m not that upset about it — something about three hour lectures in an empty movie theatre first thing in the morning is really unappealing, if you ask me.  Instead I spent my morning drinking coffee in bed and writing in my journal.  I may be taking my permanent vacation (congratulations! your imitations! … etc) mindset a little too literally…

I’ve been listening to The Maine all morning after I watched all the snaps from 8123 day yesterday — they’re so cute, it makes my heart so happy — and birthday in los angeles came on.  Honestly I skip this song a lot because it’s sort of depressing,  but it really fit the vibe today and it got me thinking about how I got to do the whole running away to the city thing.

It also got me thinking about the fact that Canada has a very limited number of big cities to run away to.  I grew up on the West Coast, in a little town on Vancouver Island (B.C.), and Toronto was always my dream city.  No one else really talked about moving here the way I did, but in the year and a half since I’ve been around at least five people from my high school have moved here.  Two girls I grew up with actually live within two blocks of me!  It really is the most New York/LA kind of place we have —  where dreams come true, you know?

forever halloween

Forever Halloween

this ain’t a scripted movie… I don’t drive a fancy car… those flashing lights don’t mean a thing to me… 

I had my fair share of I-can’t-do-this-I-don’t-belong-here moments when I moved.  I’ve seen a hundred movies and read a thousand books about people who move to the city and realize how hard it is.  They get caught up and swept away in all the people, lost in the lights and the noise and overwhelmed by the speed of everything.  I always thought it was silly, but I was finally able to see how not everyone was meant for life in a big city — I thought maybe I wasn’t meant for it either.

It’s not like I have it all figured out now or anything, but I feel like I’ve carved out a space for myself here, as one of the millions of confused souls in this place.  It feels pretty good.

Remember back in the day when your blog was like your diary — not like your personal ad space?  Blogs were written like stories, nothing was #spon and no one had a content calendar.  And, okay, as much as I know there must be a reason that style went by the wayside, I miss it.  That’s why I’ve decided to start making these song of the day posts.

Simple, casual, and honestly self centred.  Just a post about the song that’s been in my head all day, and whatever else I feel like telling my captive audience.  Lucky you!

So today’s song is Cheetah Tongue, by the Wombats — it’s a real jam, and brand new.  I have a bit of a thing for songs that make me feel like I’m in a movie, and this one definitely delivers.  Weird, I know.

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Anyway the song is off the new album Beautiful People Will Ruin Your Life, out on February 9th.  It’s exactly the combination of cute indie music + quirky lyrics + dark theme that you’d expect from the Wombats, and just different enough for us to look past the fact that they haven’t put out anything new since 2015.

In other news, today is kind of the ultimate get your shit together day.  Are you ever on a total roll, then one thing happens and next thing you know… everything is a disaster?  That’s my current state of affairs, and it’s not pretty.  I totally lose my motivation once my room gets messy or I start to fall behind on school work.  I desperately want to be that person who is always on point, but it doesn’t seem to be in the cards for me.

SO yeah, it’s a day of laundry, hot coffee, and catching up on school work for me.  But as I go about it I can’t stop thinking about vacation, and what makes a vacation, and the fact that I could call this a vacation right now if I really wanted to.

Because I mean, I love a beach and bikini vacation as much as the next girl, but the truth is right now when I imagine my ideal trip it involves eating a delicious breakfast every morning, buying my groceries from a market, drinking coffee and scribbling in my journal in charming cafes, looking at art (and making) amazing art, and just generally living it up.  And the truth is… I could do any of those things here, now, today.  Even, I think, while simultaneously listening to a lecture on statistical analysis.  I might not quite be wandering the streets of Paris, but it’s not like there’s any shortage of pastries and paintings in Toronto, right?

Vacation is a state of mind, my friends.  And I would like to be there… once my room is clean.